i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
Randomize
