i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Randomize
