I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Randomize