he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
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