i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
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