Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize