we have officially lost it.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
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This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
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I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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