Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Randomize
