So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize
