for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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