your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
so that wasnt chicken after all
wakey wakey hands off snakey
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Randomize
