so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
