she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Randomize
