no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
you never un-have a 4some
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
