But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize
