how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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