Can Purell be used as lube?
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize