matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
