i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Randomize
