you would pick up someone in the library
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
