i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
There was a lot of him and a little penis
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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