I feel like I'm in dance class right now
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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