So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
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