I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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