apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Randomize