I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Randomize
