Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
