Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
