were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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