I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
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