But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Randomize
