An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
you mean i was at the winter classic?
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
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