new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Randomize
