Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
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