so that wasnt chicken after all
our cab driver is having phone sex.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
