I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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