I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
Randomize