are you still at the devil's house?
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
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