did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize