you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
