Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
i dont even know how to be here
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
This toilet bowl is my home.
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