Whoa Z and x make the same sound
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
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