He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
