You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize
