Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
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