WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
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