didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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