Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
