What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
