Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I think my vagina is haunted
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
