Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
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I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
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I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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